Foreigner, Life Decisions, Inflection Points, and My Life in the Finger Lakes

This past October, in Cleveland, the record was (finally) set straight. Lou Gramm and Foreigner were inducted into the Rock and Roll Hall of Fame. This is recognition that, in my humble opinion, was long overdue. After all, ABBA was inducted in 2010, and Alice Cooper in 2011. Really? Before Foreigner and their iconic song Jukebox Hero?

For a kid from Upstate NY who came of age in the 1970s and 1980s, Foreigner, and especially frontman Lou Gramm, Rochester’s native son, were music royalty. Well, better late than never.

For those of you who know my brother David and his rock and roll tastes (think the Old 97’s and Slobberbone), you’ll know that at my mention of Foreigner, he’s either disowned me (again) or lost his Skyline Chili lunch, or both. But I digress. We like what we like, and Foreigner is one of my bands.

The Hall of Fame induction came with an unexpected gift: Foreigner released a song from their vault, written in 1996 but never featured on an album. Titled Turning Back the Time, it has quickly become one of my favorites. Lou’s signature voice and moving lyrics resonate deeply for me, reflecting on the events that shape our lives. For Lou, one of those moments was watching The Beatles on The Ed Sullivan Show.

As Lou sings: “I saw The Beatles on my black-and-white TV; it changed everything deep down inside of me.”

Music has that power, doesn’t it? It can stir something profound within us, marking moments that transform our lives. That song made me wonder: Did I have a moment like Lou’s? Something that changed the trajectory of my life? For me, it wasn’t one iconic event but rather a series of memories and, more importantly, a sense of place: Upstate NY.

Inflection Points and Finding Home

When you retire after a 30-plus-year career, you finally have the time to reflect, not just on your professional arc but on the decisions that shaped your life. Driving the county roads of the Finger Lakes, especially in the fall when the hills around Skaneateles Lake are painted in vibrant reds and golds, I know one thing for certain: I found my place in life.

Listening to Turning Back the Time as it played (repeatedly) on my truck speakers, I thought about the choices that created inflection points in my life. One stands out above all the others: my decision to attend college in Ithaca, NY, and most importantly in the Finger Lakes region.

At first glance, it seems like a simple story. A kid from the Midwest choosing to attend an Ivy League school. But it wasn’t the education that defined my life’s path. It wasn’t the dream of becoming an architect (a dream dashed when I was told I couldn’t draw). Nor was it the decision to major in psychology (a choice endangered when my hermit crab died one week into an animal behavior course, forever putting my GPA at serious risk). It wasn’t even the full-service bar in the student union, though I’d be lying if I said that wasn’t a checkmark in the “let’s have fun” column of the college experience.

It was the place. Ithaca, NY, located in the heart of the Finger Lakes at the southern end of Cayuga Lake.

Every time I made the nine-hour drive from Cincinnati to Ithaca, I dreaded the long drive. Eight hours of dull interstate punctuated with one last reward. The final leg, driving down Route 89 along the western shore of Cayuga Lake, made it all worthwhile. That one-hour stretch of road transformed me. The view of the lake, with vineyards rising gently up the hills, the leaves blazing with fall colors, or the first green shoots of spring after a long winter. All of it stirred something deep inside of me (Just like Lou).

The Finger Lakes and Life’s Choices

That feeling of being connected to the Finger Lakes has shaped my entire life. My first job after college was in Rochester, NY. It was there I met the love of my life, my wife of 38+ years. I earned my graduate degree in Upstate NY, nurtured my lifelong (and admittedly painful) journey as a Buffalo Bills fan, and raised two amazing sons.

For the past 40 years, the southern end of Skaneateles Lake has been my stomping grounds. It’s where I spent countless spring, summer, and fall days recharging and reconnecting. Now, in retirement, it’s where I’ve found my ultimate happy place, a reflection of everything that matters to me.

The Finger Lakes isn’t just where I live. It’s where my spirit belongs. The rolling hills, the sparkling lakes, and the changing seasons remind me of the decisions, big and small, that brought me here. As Turning Back the Time plays in the background, I find myself grateful for all the inflection points that led me to this moment.

Music, Memory, and Reflection

Music, like life, is about inflection points, moments when everything changes, often in ways we can only fully appreciate years later. For Lou Gramm, it was seeing The Beatles on a black-and-white television, an instant of inspiration that shaped not just his career but his entire identity. For me, it was a series of quiet, winding drives along Cayuga Lake, falling in love with the Finger Lakes and realizing that sometimes, the most meaningful moments are the ones that simply feel right.

I believe that songs like Turning Back the Time remind us to look back, not with regret, but with gratitude. Each choice, every detour, and even the unexpected turns along the way help shape the person we become. As I listen to Lou’s distinct voice, I don’t just hear a song. I hear the echoes of my own journey: the love of my wife, the laughter of my kids (usually at me!), the clink of bottles and glasses, shared conversation with friends, and the rustle of leaves on a crisp autumn day as I walk the road with my dog, Rigby.

Maybe that is the power of music.  It transports us, connects us, and reminds us of who we are. Whether it’s a Foreigner classic, a Beatles anthem, or even (I hate to admit it, but for my brother) an Old 97’s song. These songs are the soundtrack to our lives. They remind us of the places and people that have defined us, the decisions that shaped us, and the moments that moved us.

Where is Your Happy Place?

Now, how about you? Where is your happy place? Is it a physical spot, like a home by the lake, a quiet park, or a peaceful country road? Or is it a moment in time, sharing life with family and friends, feeling the warmth of the sun on your face, or hearing the first notes of a song that brings back a special memory?

What song, moment, or decision has shaped your life’s journey? What was your inflection point, your turning point, and your reason(s) to pause and be grateful?

For me, it’s the Finger Lakes. The hills, the lakes, the seasons. All of them are woven into the story of my life. Every drive down these familiar roads with my favorite vistas reminds me of how far I have come and how lucky I am to have found my place.

Turning Back the Time

Life doesn’t give us the luxury of rewinding, but it does allow us to reflect and carry the lessons of the past into our present. As I listen to my new favorite Foreigner song on repeat, I am thankful, not just for the decisions I got right, but for the ones that taught me something and for the people who have traveled these roads with me.

So, whether you’re inspired by a song, a place, or a moment, take the time to reflect. Turn back time and swim in the memories. Find your happy place, honor your journey, and appreciate the soundtrack of your life.

I’ve found mine. And I’m home.

Dan Troup is The Sunny Side of 57. He loves to reflect and write about life, family, career, and retirement. Check out more of his reflections on his blog site. Also, consider subscribing to The Sunny Side of 57. When not playing pickleball or hiking with Sue and Rigby, he (tries) to write a new post one to two times a month.